My Year of Writing: in Retrospect

Last year was a very good year for me. I finally found what I want to be when I grow up. It’s been an arduous search. I’m 51 years old. Spending my year writing has been life-changing, and it’s definitely what I want to continue doing.

At the beginning of last year, I really had no idea what to expect. Writing a book seemed so removed from my past experience, I had nothing on which to base my plan. However, I sat down, and slowly but surely, I got 65,000 words down, in some semblance of order.

The architecture of my book, the structure, was loose to begin with. Starting out with post-it notes and a whiteboard. I knew the general topic of the book, of course ~ it’s memoir. However, I wasn’t prepared for the emergent themes and the change in my thinking over the year. The book morphed into something I could not have imagined writing when I started. It has been a transformative undertaking. It has changed how I think and how I feel about my life.

As the book shifted, I went with it. I let go of whatever expectations I had, and trust in the process. You often hear people say this, but really, like childbirth, it’s far easier if you don’t try to maintain control.

I started out with the irrefutable facts, and the parts of my story desperate to break out of me. Some were challenging to write, but satisfying to voice. As the year went on, I realised I was holding back from writing the parts which were going to be the most difficult. I read a lot of books about truth, and authenticity. I sat in my memories, and mined down into myself as deep as I possibly could. I didn’t stop until I was sure I had hit the truth and was in a space where I was able to share it. Warts and all. I will take both the courage and the vulnerability with me.

I have around 10,000 words to write. They are predominantly in conclusion and the profoundly blissful parts of my story I want to share. I can see the finish line, and am excited about how this story may end.

This excellent year of writing has given me a great base on which to build a future writing practice. Now, to finish that book…